Steve and I with the bride and groom

Ceremonies are a big deal here in Guinea.  I can’t but help but think that a major reason for that is because so much of life is simply survival.  And when you spend so much time just trying to get through the day, a ceremony of any kind is a welcome distraction.  I’ve given up trying to understand why families who don’t have enough to feed their kids will spend so much to host a baby naming ceremony (which feeds the guests a great meal, but the kids will hungry for weeks afterwards).  Yes, ceremonies are a huge deal.  Weddings, babies, funerals…everything needs to be done just right.

Momed, Steve’s right hand man and our adopted son, thought that he had done the right ceremony to be able to marry his girlfriend last year.  Well, her family had different thoughts on that one.  They decided that what he thought was a pretty good marriage celebration was in fact just a large engagement party.  They were so serious about it in fact that almost a year later they came and took back his “wife” and baby daughter (who happens to be my namesake).  They said he could have them back when he did the marriage ceremony their way.

So, this past weekend, we provided the means for him to do everything just right.  And it was quite the bash.  Mawa’s family lives in town, so this was a much bigger wedding than the ones here in our village.  We had videotaped coverage of signing the marriage certificate at the town courthouse.  We had a band playing at her family’s house complete with an actual singer.   There was a tent where the bride and groom sat and people could come and shake their hands.  Mawa actually rented an American style wedding dress and Momed had a suit made.  None of this is common over here!  This was a big shindig!

As much as we talked about every detail beforehand, there was still so much going on that I in no way understood!  There was a lot of “oh, I forgot…” the day of and a lot of running around for Steve as he helped get everything in place.  If you thought that things were finished just because they signed legal papers at the courthouse – you would be wrong.  It wasn’t until the large group of religious leaders gave their approval that things were considered finished.  We all breathed a sigh of relief when they said that his gifts to Mawa and her family were good enough for him to marry her.

We took a lot of pictures, tried to understand what was being said by everyone and watched Ephraim yet again be the life of the party with his dancing.  We tried to get pictures of him, but it was impossible because the crowd was so thick we couldn’t get the camera near him.

It was a very long weekend.  But, they are married (for real this time!).  Gotta love the ceremonies!

The important men deciding if Momed's gift are good enough for him to marry Mawa

Live music!

Momed has become such a partner with Steve in helping our other missionaries that many of them were a part of the wedding as well. This is outside the courthouse.

A huge crowd gathered for dancing. You can see the tent for the bride and groom in the background.

A trip to the beach with the Bryant family

It seems that we are saying goodbye far too often these days.  One by one our coworkers here on the mission center are closing up their homes and heading back home.  We’ve all known for months that these days were coming, but it is still difficult.  With each goodbye our boys struggle a little bit more.  It’s hard to constantly be saying goodbye to their friends and neighbors.  It’s days full of change for us, our coworkers, and the entire village.  So, we’re trying to make the most of these last days…pool parties, trips to the beach, and sleepovers.  I want the boys to enjoy these last few days with their friends and leave Guinea with these special memories.

We had a last day of school party and the kids made shirts signed by all their schoolmates.

Pool Party fun

Maimouna and I all dressed up for a wedding (me in the outfit she had made for me)

Today was not a good one.  Lots of meetings with different people about the closing of our center and emotions are running very high these days.  It’s so hard to not to take things extremely personal for 1) ourselves and 2) all the people in the village that we care about who are losing their jobs.  I’ll admit I got pretty upset with people this morning…thankfully, I have a husband who is patient and understanding and lets me get it all out…before he tries to fix anything

In a break from those meetings, I went to visit my closest friend here in Guinea.  This is the moment I’ve been dreading since we decided to head home this summer.  She has been by my side since the day I arrived at our first home here in Guinea.  Sharing her culture, her life, and her family with me.  Her son, Momed, spends every other weekend with us and has become like another son for me.  I really, really didn’t want to tell her that I’m leaving.  As I started to tell her that I had something difficult to say, I just started crying and couldn’t get the words out.  Then she started crying and saying that she had heard that the center was closing and she figured that soon I would tell her this.  She said that she had shared with Momed a little bit so he wouldn’t be too surprised.  She said he cried for days.  Then she told me how he asked if he would be grown before I saw him again and he asked if he could come to the airport to see our plane leave.  Talk about a knife through the heart.  Seriously.  I couldn’t stop crying.  And she is crying.  And it’s just really hard.

I told her that we would still provide the funds for his school and other things he needed.  She gave me such a gift when she said that it wasn’t about the money.  She said that we are like sisters and her heart hurts for me to leave her.  She assured me that she knows how much I love them too.

I cried all the way home too.  My heart is heavy.  My kids know that this breaking my heart.  But, I don’t want them to feel like it’s all their fault.  That I’m going home just because they need me too.  I want them to know that I’m sacrificing right now because they are THAT important.  So, I want to do it with a smile.  I want to share in their excitement over movie theaters, ice cream, pizza in a box (Ephraim), and especially over seeing family and friends.  But, man this is hard.  So hard.

We need your prayers in the weeks to come as there are so many goodbyes.

Momed with our boys and his younger brothers on Christmas Eve

Steve teaching the guys how to grill hamburgers one night

Titi, Daouda, Gnaissa, Oumar, Youssof, Saliou, Mamadou…I want you to know these names.  I want to ask you pray for these young men that you will most likely never meet.  We have such a burden to see these young men embrace the truths of the Gospel.  These seven young men have become so dear to our hearts.

What a journey we’ve been on with them.  In the time we’ve come to know them; one has lost his mother, two have seen their mothers suffer from AIDS, one has been in prison, one has had major surgery on his legs, and those are just the major events.  What we’re the most thankful has been those everyday moments.  The talks on our porch, the soccer matches, the endless foosball tournaments, watching them play with our boys and so many other things.  God has blessed us with these guys.

They come to our house just about everyday to earn a little spending money with whatever job I can come up with.  If there are no jobs that day, they just hang out and try to practice their growing English vocabulary on me.  But, we’ve also been setting aside Thursday nights as a time to meet with them and discuss our faith.  They come dressed in their best to enjoy dinner with us and then they sit and talk for a couple of hours with Steve.  He went through a book called “The Lamb” with them which very clearly lays out why we need a Savior.  We’ve spent time talking about the differences between their religion and ours.  It’s been wonderful to see them come out of their shells and discuss the tough issues.  Steve has shared his testimony with them and shared the Gospel as clearly as he can.

Now, comes the tough part.  Now comes the time to trust that God will do something amazing in their lives.  Praying that each of them would see how empty and hopeless their religion is and to seek after the one true God who will never abandon them.  We’re asking each of you to be praying for these special men as well!

Piling their plates full for an American bbq

Enjoying lunch with the guys

One of my favorite reasons for having my parents come visit us a couple years ago was that they could now REALLY know what our life was like over here.  I can try to paint a picture in an email or on this blog, but to truly understand – well, it’s just something you have to experience.

So, we were pretty excited when our friend Chris wrote to us and wondered what we would think of him coming for a visit.  We were a bit skeptical at first that it could really happen because coming here for a visit is no small feat.  There are shots needed, passports needed, entry visas needed, expensive plane tickets needed…and the list goes on.  I honestly waited for an email that said it was just all too much to go through for a short visit.  BUT, he persevered through it all and endured the very long flight to join us here in Guinea.

Since Chris is a builder in the States, we thought it would be great for him to get involved with one of Steve’s building projects he has going on.  One of our missionary co-workers is moving to a new village and Steve is busy building her a new home.  So, Chris was able to spend quite a bit of time with Steve out in this other village building a house brick by brick.  He slept out in that village, ate rice and sauce like everyone else, joined in the camaraderie with the other guys (even without really being able to speak to them!) and caught a glimpse of how Steve spends his days.

Steve cutting through the brick walls to put in windows

The house that they are in the process of building

His days were also filled with meeting endless amounts of people who were so eager to shake his hand.  We took him to so many homes to greet our friends here.  We kept explaining to him that it wasn’t so much that WE thought he needed to greet all those people, but that THEY would be very offended if we didn’t introduce Chris to them.  He heard how all of those people had come into our lives and how God continues to grow those friendships.  He held some of the babies that we are providing food for and heard how God has blessed their growth.  He went on medical runs with Steve and listened as we tried to help those who were hurting.  We went to church in town and he was able to see believers standing up for their faith in this difficult setting.

Chris getting in on a soccer game with kids in the village

Chris with Steve and the teens who meet here on Thursdays

He was also able to see the realities of life as a missionary…people at the house ALL the time, no privacy, the heat, the stresses of so many depending on us, missing family and the familiar…he is able to pray for us in a new way now that he has spent some time here with us.

So, in light of all these things he has seen and the people he met, I’m sure it’s not the brick work that he will remember most from his trip.  I wish he could write to you of his experiences himself…he’s been gone a few weeks now and it almost feels unreal that he was even here.  His trip was especially encouraging to Steve who truly appreciated the long talks and thoughts Chris had to share.

We praise God for allowing Chris to come and see our lives here firsthand and we thank God for how he used the trip in each of our lives.  Continue praying for wisdom and clarity for us in the days ahead.

Ephraim all bandaged up for a couple of weeks

Each time I sit down to write an update to our week or share a story with you, I struggle with how to explain a world so completely foreign to us Americans.  I think to myself how insane the week has been and that surely the next week will be quieter.  Funny, how that quiet week just doesn’t seem to come.

Our week is always filled with crazy stories, heart breaking situations, and busy days.  This past week is giving us a taste of the hot season that is quickly approaching and it indeed does make everything even more difficult to deal with.  Believe me, it’s a struggle to stay patient and pleasant with everyone with temps reaching 120 (that will be the normal temp in April)!  Our afternoons are getting hotter and hotter and pretty soon these afternoons temps will be what we are waking up to.

Heat aside, this week has brough some major issues for us to deal with.

A friend was brought in the middle of the night very sick.  After a few days of tests she is staying in her family’s village for a while.  Which confuses me because she never stays there unless she’s mad at her husband.  But, no one will say why she is there.  And her kids are here in our village with the 2nd wife to take care of them.  I wish I wasn’t the outsider and just KNEW what was going on.

One of the teens coming to our Bible study was involved in a motorcyle accident this week.  His passenger struck a child going through a crowd and the little boy died.  Very long story.  He was in jail almost a week as his family had to negotiate his release.  We, as Americans take it for granted that we have an actual judicial system.  There was an issue over his fine because it was known that his parents work for us and therefore they wanted quite a bit of money.  It was a tough situation for us because yes, we had the money and could have paid it.  But, it would have been the same story for the next situation, and the next and the next…We know that we can’t solve everyone’s problems.  In the end, we gave an amount and said it was the most we could help with.  After a few days of stand-off, they accepted the money and he was released.  It was a very dramatic week with MANY conversations with people about what to do.

Ephraim gave us a little scare the other day when he accidently punched the kitchen counter with all his might and his hand immediately swelled and turned black and blue.  After waiting a few hours we decided that it was probably broken.  There is a hospital about an hour away that can do x-rays, so Steve took him there the following morning.  He thought it was pretty great that he would get out of writing in school for a few weeks, but has realized that it also means he can’t play soccer, play the wii or build legos very well.  It may be a long couple of weeks.

We’ve been dealing with some family issues a lot in the past few weeks and we’d appreciate your prayers for us as we seek the best way to parent our boys.  Steve being gone a lot has taken a toll.  We want to be understanding of where they are coming from and at the same time teach them the acceptable ways to express their frustrations.  I’m reading a book called “The heart of anger” and the very beginning reminds us that God does not give us children to raise without giving us all the tools to do a good job at it.  We just need to keep asking God for His wisdom.

I hope that every post I write reminds you how much we need your prayers.  We’re living in a culture and language not our own…with a faith that makes no sense to most everyone around us…homeschooling our children…no “date nights”…missing our family and friends…livng with very little privacy…very much missing worshipping with our church…

I say all those things so that you know how you can be specifically praying for our family and our ministry.  We are a body of Christ and we are your hands and feet as we serve here.  We are so thankful to know that you stand behind us!

Our friend, Titi, is the second from the left.

One of the twins we've been feeding

Hard to believe that they came to us at just two pounds

This is a baby suffering from the same horrible rash that MANY other people come to us for help with.

The Hofer family

A week ago, I was in the midst of planning a large Employee Appreciation meal for all those in the village who work here on our center…a total of 57 people.  Lots of meal planning, shopping, arrangements, small gifts…and last Saturday was to be the day for the big event.  I was sitting with a group of ladies peeling huge amounts of potatoes when one of our co-workers came running out to say that their little girl had fallen and broken her arm.  They needed someone to take them to the nicer hospital about an hour away.  I went over to see how bad the situation was and Steve grabbed his bag to head to the hospital.  This was definitely an emergency…her arm was not only broken but the bone had come through.

Steve spent all day at the hospital with them while Elise went into surgery.  Steve was so encouraged to see how Brian and Sherri kept reminding Elise and themselves that in the midst of uncertainity God was ever present.  It was a very long day and in the midst of the surgery, the doctors came out to say that not only did Elise have a compound fracture and a broken wrist, but she had also severed her artery and had cut into her bicep muscle.  The surgery continued for hours as the bone doctor worked to repair the artery and muscle.

The next day the doctors came to say that they felt that the muscle and artery damage was more than they could deal with in Guinea and so we began making plans to get the family out of the country.  At the end of MANY long discussions, it was decided that Steve would fly with Brian and Elise to France to see the specialists there.  Sherri would stay here in Guinea with their two younger sons until we knew what they were saying in France.  To make a long story short, the surgeons there were very pleased with the surgery that Elise had had in Guinea and felt that she could go on to the States without having surgeries in France.  This was such good news!  Elise’s spirits perked up a lot once she was out of the hospital and together the three of them enjoyed a day of sight-seeing in Paris.

While I didn’t compltely enjoy his facebook posts about all the great food he was eating and sights he was visiting…I was so relieved to hear that Elise was being given such a good prognosis and that they would be able to head back to the States.  Brian and Elise headed to the States at almost the same time that Steve headed back here to Guinea.  Sherri and their two boys, along with our co-worker Janel, headed to the States from here on Saturday.

What a week…it was a crazy week for the kids and I here without Steve too.  But, that will have to be for another post…I have lots of stories!

Thanks for all the prayers said for us this week…it was a huge encouragement in the midst of all the difficulties!

Brian and Elise right off the bus in front of the Eiffel Tower

Steve in front of the Eiffel Tower

Our friends new baby (to be named on the 8th day)

What a week.  Honestly I think every day I have said to Steve, “I’m not sure I’m going to get through today”.  It’s been a week of extreme emotions – going from overwhelmed to excited to discouraged to relieved to…I know that we all face tough situations in our lives, but being here has the added challenge of never being able to escape those tough situations.  You can’t leave the problems at the office.

It kind of started with our generator being stolen last week.  I know it’s just a “thing” and honestly we weren’t worried about the actual generator (although it would be really nice to get it back!) but more what the theft represented.  The generator was being stored in a shed on the other side of the mission center – sometime in the night the fence was cut, the shed door busted and the thieves carried the generator away.  We wouldn’t have heard anything.  Someone told us the next day and we’ve tried to go about things in the right way.  But, it’s been very discouraging to know that someone would steal it.  It’s discouraging to know that I’m sure someone in the village is very aware of who the thief is.  It’s hard to not want to just tell everyone that I don’t feel like helping them if they are going to steal.  But, one of our co-workers reminded us that Satan is going to use anything to discourage us and keep us from being there for the people we came to serve.

A week of many sick people isn’t unusual, but many of the sick have needed a lot of attention.  Our friend, Kinda, has been making great strides to recover from illnesses, but he continues to remain very weak and infections keep bothering him.  Steve has been taking him to the hospital almost every day to changes bandages.

Our friend, Maimouna, also needed to be in the hospital this week.  She was in the last days of pregnancy and not feeling well.  But, she hated being in the hospital (which is understandable) and so we kept visiting every day.  Thankfully, just a few days ago, she gave birth to a healthy baby girl!  Steve brought them home right away from the hospital and mom and baby are doing well.

We’ve been helping a young man be able to live in town and go to school this year.  But, no matter what we do, how much we help – it’s just never enough.  He always wants more and more and more.  He is a young believer as well and so we’ve really struggled with how to help him understand that at 20 years old, he needs to be more responsible.  He became very angry at us this week when we wouldn’t agree to giving him a very large financial gift and said some hurtful things.  But, then a few days later, he came to tell us that he had “been sick in his heart” for those days knowing that he was wrong.  He asked our forgiveness and said that he would do what he needed to in order to show us that he was truly sorry.  I’m so thankful to see God working in his life…

I went to visit the twins we are providing food for.  It was like a celebrity had come to their little village…very humbling.  EVERYONE wanted me to take their picture.  My little twins are doing so great.  They are growing so big!  Then sadly, I found out that a woman in the village that we had been medically caring for, was diagnosed with AIDS.  She is the mother of one of the teen boys who hang out at our house all the time.  I can’t say anything to the son, so we’re just helping how we can.

There have been deaths this week in the village.  Many more sick people needing us.  It seems that everything is a good with a bad.  It’s just been so much this week.  This post is long and not even close to all the situations that have come up this week.  Trying to handle all the requests and needs is so huge – and trying to do it all in a culture so different from our own is an added challenge.  Trying to communicate effectively in a language that is not our own is another challenge.  So, I hope that you can see how much we need your prayers.  How much we need to know that we have people who know our struggles and want to encourage our hearts.  Keep those prayers coming!

Visiting one night out in the village

One of the twins, Alisan, looking a little scared of the camera

The twins back home in their village. Ladies put the mud on their heads because they say it makes the softspot harden up.

The parents of this village wanted a picture with all their kids holding up their religions prayer tablets. I didn't quite know what to say, so I indulged them.

Learning the ropes of being a blacksmith

We’ve just given my mom a new reason to fear for the life of her grandchild…maybe not quite that drastic, but we’re definitely making her nervous!  Malachi is completely fascinated by all things dangerous.  To him, if there’s no element of danger to something then why bother doing it?  So, it comes as no surprise that he thinks the blacksmith in our village has the coolest job.  Burning coal, pounding out burning metal, and making it into tools and weapons…how cool is that?  Steve has taken Malachi to visit the blacksmith several times as he is always making tools for us to use around here.

Then Steve had the idea that instead of Malachi just watching the blacksmith at his shop – how about we recreate one here at our house for Malachi to use whenever he wants???  Doesn’t that sound like a completely safe idea?  So, we’ve been buying up the needed items to start his shop and we had the blacksmith make Malachi his very own set of blacksmithing tools.  He was so excited to see it all come together.  Then we had Sajo (the blacksmith) come out for the day to show Malachi how to position everything and how to get started on his own.  My boys were completely enthralled with the process.  It’s totally a boy thing as Steve says.

You start a fire and get the charcoal burning.  Then you have a fan that you turn by hand to blow air into the coals to keep it burning hot.  You put the metal into the coals until it’s flaming red.  Then pull it out and quickly start pounding into the shape you want.  After a few pounds the metal cools and back into the coals it goes.  You just keep doing this process.  My boys think it is the greatest thing that now they make their own arsenal of weapons right out back.

This definitely falls under that catagory of “only if you grow up in Africa can you do this”.  I told my mom that Children’s Services would probably be calling if we were home in the States.  As dangerous as it may be, I do love that my kids share in an important part of the culture they live in.  This is how stuff is made and I love that they are learning about it.  I love that it helps build relationships even more with the people around us.  It’s all about sharing in each others lives!

Keeping those coals nice and hot

Getting started on his first project

Merry Christmas

Living here in Guinea, Christmas could really come and go and you wouldn’t really notice.  There are no lights on houses, no TV specials, no stores full of gift giving ideas, no signs of Christmas anywhere.  It can be difficult to think of all the traditions happening without us back home.  It can be difficult to read how everyone is celebrating the season…BUT, there are also great things about having Christmas over here.  It’s much easier to focus on the real meaning of Christmas when you take away all the hype and commercialism.  There was no mention of Santa Claus at all.

We read from the book of Luke several times and talked about how amazing it was that God would choose to send His Son as a baby in a manger.  Luke 2:10-11, “Then the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all the people.  For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.”

When we read that I asked the boys why is it good tidings with great joy?  They knew it was because Jesus would save us all from our sins.  Then we started talking about all the people in our village.  I asked if their religion is full of good tidings and great joy?  They knew too that it is not.  All the people around us are just trying to do enough good things to make up for the bad things in the hope that their god will let them into paradise.  That can’t bring joy to a soul.  I just kept reading that passage and thinking how much I long for my friends and neighbors to know true joy.  To no longer strive to be good enough, but to rest in the fact that God already did everything for them.

Of course, with three boys, we did celebrate Christmas with a few traditions.  We made Christmas cookies (even as our frosting was melting And we sang Christmas carols and had some presents for them.  We asked our guard to give us a few hours as a family on Christmas morning without people needing us.  They think it is so incredibly odd that we would want to be alone for ANY reason!

We spent Christmas Eve and Christmas Day visiting with our friends and family in the village – giving out gifts and offering our holiday greetings.  It’s a bit hard for them to offer those greetings back to us since it is rejoicing in the birth of Jesus, but we appreciate their efforts.  It was such a wonderful time giving gifts to others.  I had a great time of choosing clothes, toys, and candies for each family.  Our boys loved being a part of it and helping kids with their gifts.  I love that we could share our holiday with our friends this way.  I love that we can bring some of our world into theirs and let them know how much we care about them.  I have tons of pictures, but here are some of my favorites…

Taking gifts to friends and their kids

I loved seeing their excited littles faces as we visited different families

Having a fashion show trying on the new clothes

Visiting my namesake Casey with her parents Mohammed and Mawa.

I love seeing how happy they were to get gifts for baby Casey

Sweet baby Casey and I