Matt and Erin Castagna connecting you to tribal missions As a part of our language learning course we try and get out and experience “culture events”. Basically it’s being intentional about being an active participant in the community then using those events we participate in to learn new words. So say we go to a wedding, we take a bunch of pictures and then sit down with a language helper and all our pictures (which we still need to find someone! Pray we can find the right people!) and ask them what different nouns or verbs are in the pictures.
One culture event we are a part of can last for several days with our language helper. A culture event doesn’t have to be some big event like a wedding or funeral. It can be as simple as taking a taxi, cooking a meal, or going to the market. We will try and meet with a language helper 3-5 days a week for two hours at a time and try and learn 75-120 new words per week.
Last week we participated in a big culture event here in the Philippines, November 1, All Saints Day. It’s a national holiday here, a VERY big deal for most Filipinos. Maybe you know, maybe you don’t…but I have a sister who is buried here in the Philippines. Emily Ann Nordick. She died at just 14 months, I was about 4 years old. Since we’ve been back I’ve been meaning to get over to the cemetery and get the grave all cleaned up and just go back again. All our teachers were encouraging us to go to a cemetery on All Saints Day and experience this big part of Filipino culture so it just worked out.
Last time I went was four years ago and that was the first time in 10 years. I was a basket case, cried the entire way there in the taxi and the entire way back, took a lot of pictures only to accidently delete them later that night. It was a mess. I think that since I don’t remember the actual funeral or anything about when she died I really did my grieving then! It was always this open ended event that didn’t have any closure. I finally got closure. This year I held it together much better! I did have a lot of distractions, we brought both kids and a few other people in our class, plus it was SO SO busy there! I have never seen anything like it. People were camped out. Almost every grave had a tent over it, some complete with air mattresses and a buffet line of food. Families come and spend the day with their deceased loved one. There are lots of lit candles and food and praying and singing going on. We don’t really understand much about what was happening yet, it was just a lot of observing. Hopefully once we find a language helper we can ask some more questions about what happens and the meaning of it all.
My whole life I’ve felt like I have this hole in my life….my sister. The sister I was supposed to grow up with, supposed to laugh and cry with, supposed to have sisterly tiff’s with, the one I could tell everything. I have this whole relationship built up in my mind that was taken away from me. I will always be sad about Emily. I will always miss her, even though I don’t remember her. I will always miss what could have been. Some people have asked why I would have wanted to come back to the Philippines when such a horrible thing happened here in my family’s life. Well, having her here makes the Philippines feel even more like home. A part of my family is here, the Philippines will always have a special place in my life because of that. It doesn’t make me resent being here, it doesn’t scare me with my kids – the things that happened to Emily were unknown, probably would have been unknown even if we were in the States. It could happen anywhere. Life is just fragile, I’m glad I know the one who holds it all together….
Flowers
[...] Tuesday was November 1. A HUGE holiday here in the Philippines. Most kids have at least a week off of school. On the actual holiday most people are at the cemetery, visiting the grave of different loved ones. They go there to remember and to pray for the soul of their departed loved one. Sometimes people stay at the grave all day and all night! They bring flowers, eat food and a lot of times set up a tent type thing over the gravesite…it gets hot and sunny out there! Last year we went to a cemetery but this year stayed home. Here’s pics and what we did last year… [...]
Yes, it would be similar to Mexcian traditions. We were told it’s very much a Catholic tradition here.
I was just thinking about Emily the other day. I’m glad you were able to grieve.
So sorry about Emily. My adopted sister Becca lost her sister to a snowplow. My sister was 4yrs old when her younger sister was killed. Her mother and father always told her that they wish it was her (Becca) who would have died. That is why Becca is part of our family. Her senior year she decided she had enough of her parents hateful comments.
I really wanted to comment that a missionary told me that the Mexicans are a lot like the Philippine people. On October 30-31st the Mexicans celebrate the day of the dead. They do the same thing set up tents decorate the grave and make food for the dead. I’ve always wanted to stop and walk around but the last two years we’ve been in route to church and unable to stop.
Erin, Bill and I were there the night Emily died. It was one of the saddest days in my life. Sometime I’d like to talk to you about it and about Emily. I remember her. She was a doll.
Love,
Donna
I am so glad that you git to experience the celebration of All Saints Day. I remember when I was little, my siblings and I were always excited to go to the cemetery too.